Seeking the Obvious

 

A Conversation with Christopher Leitch and Stuart Hinds

By David Wesley

If anything has threatened my marriage it is my “ability” to lose keys, wallets and other things that lead to a frantic search.   I look under every cushion and explore impossibilities like looking in the freezer.  What normally happens is that after this frantic search what I was hunting for was on the table or in plain sight all along.  The day my wife and I were heading to the hospital for her to give birth to our first child this happened, only to discover the car keys in my pocket after a frantic search.

Like finding something that has been missing, the conversations that I have had in November are with individuals who live around me in Kansas City. They are in plain view, have fascinating stories and have something to teach me. What a gift!  Like many people, I spend most of my time with people that have similar life stories that I have and who share similar values when it comes to religion and socio-economic location. I hate to admit it, but I tend to read news that affirms my bias and I spend too much time telling people what I think rather than listening to what they think.   In many ways this type of perspective leads us to be like a narcissistic echo chamber. This holiday season, however, I have been blessed by  people who have contributed their time and lives to help me hear some important things about gratitude, marginality, investing in others, and many other things that I did not know.

The latest conversation with Christopher Leith and Stuart Hinds came through a referral from Kirk Nelson and Bruce Winters (aka Melinda Rider) that I met a couple of weeks ago. Kirk and Bruce were referred to me by my neighbor Gary Banta.

 Christopher Leitch is a nationally exhibited artist.  He describes himself as a visual artist working with unpredictable methods and various media. The content and images of his works are determined by chance occurrences and random processes. Christopher says “I never know what anything’s going to look like. This uncertainty is liberating and invigorating.” In many ways, the ‘liquid’ nature of Christopher’s art reflects his Buddhist faith which was also an important part of our StoryCorps conversation.

To learn more about Christopher’s artwork and other examples of his influential work in Kansas City including his position as the director of Community Relations at Johnson County Library see the links below[i].  

Stuart Hinds is assistant dean for special collections and archives at the University of Missouri-Kansas City libraries. He is also the founder of GLAMA: Gay and Lesbian Archive of Mid-America[ii].  I happened to be watching a PBS special a few evenings ago and was fascinated by Stuart’s work with the GLAMA collection at UMKC.  The LaBuddle Special Collections and GLAMA are a part of the UMKC libraries[iii].  The work that Stuart does as a curator and academic archivist is cutting edge as he tells the story of the LGBT community from the perspective of an insider historian. Much of my conversation with Christopher and Stuart revolved around their work within this focus.  Stuart is currently working on a history of LGBT in Kansas City. The forthcoming book will be published by University Press of Kansas with a tentative title of Cowtown Queers: a History of LGBT Kansas City.  This important work provides unique historical manuscript and important perspective for those who are LGBT and better understanding for those who are not.

The limitations of COVID as well as the brevity of StoryCorps which restricts interviews to 40 minutes was frustrating as I realized that Christopher and Stuart have a world of knowledge and experience that go far beyond what could fit into these constraints. Beyond this, Stuart and Christopher are just fascinating people with whom I share common interests in culture, academics, and art.  Frankly stated, they are people that I would want to call friends.  I am hopeful to continue my conversations with Stuart and Christopher  in the months to come in a post-pandemic reality.

I encourage you to listen to the StoryCorps conversation that we recently did: https://archive.storycorps.org/interviews/david-wesley-christopher-leitch-and-stuart-hinds-conversation/

 

 

 

 

 

 

---

[i] http://kcstudio.org/dream-drawings-christophe-leitch/

https://www.christopherleitchstudio.net/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/christopher-leitch-b575596/

[ii] https://www.flatlandkc.org/news-issues/gay-and-lesbian-archive-of-mid-america-celebrates-a-decade/

[iii] https://library.umkc.edu/labudde

A Shared Table and Wholeness: A Conversation with Robin Greathouse

 

It may seem odd to seek God in places other than a secluded monastery, a church or with those who participate in an organized church. All of these are important, and I am grateful for them in my life. What if, however, God was to be found,  not just  in orthodoxy and sameness but rather in the places where we come together with different stories or with different parts of the same story and share life as brothers and sisters with a quest for wholeness?  Just maybe in the process God would be found and together we will be made whole.

William Blake described this way of finding God in one another.  “I sought my soul, but my soul I could not see. I sought my God, but my God eluded me. I sought my brother, and I found all three.”

The oneing project is, in many ways a spiritual journey. In my own quest for a holy life I am finding wholeness can be found as we share life with one another.

The picture above reflects how we come together around a common table and share life. You should also note a reflection of Jesus at that table of oneness.

I imagine these interviews as a way for us to come around a table. I am grateful for the interviews thus far with Gary, Bruce, Kirk and Janel.  Today I have invited Robin to join us at the table as we share life.

Before I interview new friends I try to find out as much as I can about them.  A Google search does not always give the full or accurate picture of a person.  When I did a search for Robin Greathouse for example,  I saw a mugshot of him from the Southeast Correctional Facility in Ozark County.   

The article recounted the culmination of the worst days of Robin’s life including a capital murder charge at 17 years old[i].  According to the article, 11 of the 12 jurors voted for the death penalty. The one juror who voted against it was an alternate juror. The headline for the article states “Sentenced to life in prison 40 years ago, Greathouse now resentenced to 50 years”.   Robin’s age at the time of the crime which was not considered in 1979 was a primary factor in the change of sentence.  Robin is currently a front line coach at the Shelter KC.

An article in the Shelter KC publication(ii)  shares the story that led up to this sentencing.  The first 12 years of Robin’s life involved being abandoned by his mother and father and abuse by his alcoholic uncle. By his teens he fell into deep drug addiction, which led to a tragedy that would take away much of his life. In a drugged state, Robin shot and killed a friend who was trying to take his car keys.

The worst day for Robin, however, was not the last word for his life. My conversation with Robin enriched my own life and I am grateful for a new friend.

I met Robin at the KC Shelter on a sunny and warm November afternoon. Just off of a major highway and strategically located in an industrial part of downtown Kansas City, the shelter is a place of hospitality and safety for people who need a place off of the streets.  I expected to see the face that I saw in the mug photo when I met Robin. Instead I was greeted by a peaceful and relaxed version of Robin. In many ways it was hard to imagine that he had spent the last 40 years of his life in prison with seemingly no hope of ever leaving.  

Early in our conversation Robin surprised me by stating  "I have so much to be grateful for".  He stated, "one of the greatest joys that I have is simply to see fresh snow in the morning, or to be walking down the street and see the stop signs and traffic, then realize that I am free".  

When asked about the most challenging time in his life, Robin stated it was just after he was released from prison. This, he said, was more difficult than any of the earlier things he had gone through.  "I was on the street and had no idea what to do".  At one point Robin was standing on a bridge over a major highway and thought to himself "I don't know if anyone would even care if I jumped off and took my life".  Again, the worst day for Robin was not the last word for his life. Somehow, he said, there was a deep awareness that God cared about him.  Robin found his way to Shelter KC where he found a host of people who cared deeply for him. They have become his lifeline. 

Most recently Robin is thinking forward to a new life of gratitude and peace. Without doubt Robin has great words of wisdom for youth who are in a similar place in life as he was at seventeen. 

Robin represents many others who are at a reset point in their lives.  I am honored that Robin gifted me with the opportunity to hear more of his story. 

The StoryCorps interview has a poor quality of sound (my fault) but can be found at: https://archive.storycorps.org/communities/oneing/ 

Image: Center panel of triptych, Vincent de Paul with the poor at circular table of the Lord, face shown on table; dog at lower left; original in Vincentian church, chapel of Mercy, Graz, http://stvincentimages.cdm.depaul.edu/Pictures/2.%20Paintings/Austria,%20Graz,%20Vincent%20de%20Paul%20with%20poor%20at%20table.jpg

---

i    http://www.ozarkcountytimes.com/news-local-news-court-news/sentenced-life-prison-40-years-ago-greathouse-now-resentence

ii  https://www.shelterkc.org/connect/media-center/connect-easter-2020-volume-19-number-1/

The Oneing Project

Note: The term "oneing" is borrowed from Richard Rohr and the Center for Action and Contemplation who use the word to express the divine unity that stands behind all of the divisions, dichotomies, and dualisms in the world.(I highly recommend that you see Rohr's use of oneing at  https://cac.org/oneing-2016-11-25/) In the same vein I pray that through mutual conversations the words of Jesus "that they may be one" will become a bit closer to reality within our tribalized society. 

This project began as a quest to be faithful to my identity as a follow of Jesus as I listen to people around me as persons and friends rather than labels and enemies. I acknowledge that friends may have different perspectives than my own. That is fine.  Too often I/we only listen to those who think like ourselves and our lives become insular and disconnected with society. In some ways I am influenced by missionary E. Stanley Jones who lived in India and was known for what he called round table discussions in which he invited leading representatives of different faiths, including agnostics and atheists to openly listen to one another. Although my beginning point is one of simply listening, I hope that those who gift me with their time and story will be a part of a bigger story of hope for a divided society.

At this point, I do not know where this project will lead. This is not an academic exercise but rather my own way to explore what it means to share life with new friends.  My goal is to chat with as many people as possible from November 2020-November 2021. I am intentionally looking for people that I would not normally connect with who are distinctly different from me in relation to faith, gender identity, ethnicity, etc.  At minimum I selfishly hope that these conversations will result in new friends.  A bonus would be for the friendships to be a way to understand one another and the values that make us who we are.  Thus the title, “Oneing”. 

The project is divided in two sections.  I encourage you to start with the StoryCorps section then read the blogsite section.  The StoryCorps section will be interviews that give the "back-stage" perspectives of the friends being interviewed.  While the professions and lives of people are absolutely fascinating I begin by listening to people beyond their labels, professions or persona.  After listening to the StoryCorps interview, you can then connect to the blog site where I will give the "front-stage" perspective of the person. 

David Wesley

Janel Bowers and Friends of JCDS

    Occasionally we come across people who have learned to live beyond and outside their self-interest for the good of others. At the end of my first interview with Bruce and Kirk I asked them for advice for another interview. They both mentioned Janel Bowers and now I know why. I am fortunate to have crossed paths with Janel.

    Janel is the Chief Development and Operations Officer for an organization in Kansas City, Friends of JCDS. Janel, in many ways, embodies the mission of Friends of JCDS, an organization that finds creative ways to respond to the need of individuals to be successful in society as they face the reality of  intellectual and development challenges. Friends of JCDS, a non profit is separate from  JCDS, a government organization.  They do, however, work in kinship as Friends of JCDS supports individuals JCDS serves.  Friends of JCDS works to provide, real affordable housing in Johnson county which is a rarity. The housing that Friends of JCDS provide are affordable as well as physically accessible.

    Janel began her role at Friends of JCDS in 2015. This week she will be leading the completion of their 16^th home. Rent for these homes are $325 a month, making the homes affordable.  Her background and skills lead Janel to have a holistic approach that works toward the overall well-being of people who live in their home including basic needs and well-being to thrive in society.

    I encourage you to listen to the discussion that Janel and I had on Story Corps that will help you know Janel better: https://archive.storycorps.org/communities/oneing/  While you are there, check out the interview with Bruce and Kirk whose story is also on this page.

For further information about Janel see:  

https://www.linkedin.com/in/janel-bowers-m-a-a78aa68

https://unitedwaygkc.galaxydigital.com/agency/detail/?agency_id=54458

https://shawneemissionpost.com/2019/10/07/friends-of-jcds-celebrates-renovation-of-14th-home-in-growing-collection-of-affordable-accessible-housing-83251/

 

Bruce Winter (AKA Melinda Ryder) and Kirk Nelson

 
Every now and then one gets opportunities to talk to fascinating people who are true to themselves and are people that you want to call your friend. The first interview for this project is a couple that I met through my neighbor, Gary Banta who introduced us.  The interview with Bruce and Kirk can be found on StoryCorps at https://archive.storycorps.org/communities/oneing  I encourage you to listen to the StoryCorps interview first, then come back here for the rest of the story. 

I have to admit that I know nearly nothing of the craft that is Melinda's profession. In preparation for the interview I began to listen to other interviews that Bruce has done and look up some background information.  Bruce is best known as Melinda Ryder, who established a place for female impersonation in Kansas City gay clubs, her leadership in the LGBTQ community and her work to raise funds for a variety of charitable organizations. 

Bruce moved to Kansas City in the late 1970’s and was surprised that there was no female impersonation in any of the local gay clubs. Kansas City had a history of female impersonators entertaining straight audiences, but Ryder was a pioneer in bringing the art to clubs that catered to the LGBT demographic.

After moving to Kansas City, Bruce met Kirk Nelson, hairdresser, make-up artist, costume designer and as Bruce says it “all around fabulous drag husband.” The two have been together for 38 years, both on stage and in life. One article states “If you’ve seen Melinda Ryder wear it, chances are that Nelson has lent his creativity to it”.

In addition to other achievements, Ryder has reigned as Miss Gay Mid-West America 1979, Miss Gay Kansas America 1982, Miss Gay Missouri 1984 and Miss Gay Show Me State USA 1989. Nationally, she was second runner-up to Miss Gay America 1984. She was also honored with a Lifetime Achievement Award at the Zoey Awards in 2008.

Those in Kansas City  may know Ryder from her performances and emceeing at Club Cabaret, Starz on Broadway, Frisco Club, The Edge, Sidekicks, Missie B’s and many other venues around the city.

The charity and community organizations that Ryder supports include Show Me Pride, the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, Be The Match and No MoreHomeless Pets.

Since 2002, Winter has survived non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma twice and pre-leukemia once. He has undergone two stem cell transplants and is now fifteen years out with no signs of disease.

I came across an excellent NPR interview with Melinda/Bruce that gives a good overview of Melinda’s career and marriage to Kirk.

https://www.kcur.org/show/central-standard/2016-03-11/kansas-citys-drag-matriarch-turns-60-this-weekend

For historical background on  female impersonation including a featured piece on Melinda Ryder: https://library.umkc.edu/content/images/glama/timeline/curator-program-hinds.pdf

References for this post:  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tnr9TUngAaY

https://camp.lgbt/2016/02/16/melinda-ryder-40-years-of-drag-and-a-60th-birthday-celebration/